i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
pray to the hookup gods
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
