k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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