so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Randomize