Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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