I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
