Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
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