Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Send help, water and tortillas.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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