at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.