You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
