...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
