i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
cat food counts as protein by the way
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
