If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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