You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
