well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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