You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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