This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
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it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
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we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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