At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
