He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize