I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I am available for nakedness
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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