Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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