Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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