He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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