No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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