I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
