'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
My breasts were aching with rage.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
