he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking