Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
