What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
