Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
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I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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