FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize