You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
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Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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