Please, let me fuck your mom
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
