When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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