Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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