Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
