so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
