This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
