chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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