It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
My pussy is not your playground.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
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