2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
