i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
