Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
