Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize