nut hugger
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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