White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
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