I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize