He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
