I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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