Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
