I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
